O shame, where is thy blush?
Rebellious hell,
If thou canst mutine in a matron's bones,
To flaming youth let virtue be as wax
And melt in her own fire.
A Day in the Life
Marry, I will, let them play it. Is not a comonty a Christmas
gambold, or a tumbling-trick?
~The Taming of the Shrew Induction, scene 2
Yes, I know, it's not Christmas. Nor is this post about Christmas. Way to observe.
Sorry again for it being soooo long since I've blogged. Wow, since before spring break. Well, I went to NYC for spring break and it was pretty much amazing...and since then I have been SUPER busy! But that's not the reason for this post...
So this weekend started with an amazing KidStuf awards that was a TON of fun and then Saturday I drove down to Chattanooga for the day to throw my sister a wedding shower and drove back up so that I could be at church this morning and Night of Worship tonight.
Yeah so, I'm usually scatter-brained and/or crazy for everyone who knows me, you can attest to that fact, but I need to have a serious moment today.
Lately I've been thinking about a ton of stuff. Mainly school but a lot about life also. This summer I'm going to be working 3 jobs so that I can continue to come to the University of Tennessee because I really feel like God is calling me to be here for this season in my life. Where He wants me and what he wants me to do after college is a completely different story, because I have no idea! God has really been convicting me of not handing stuff over to him lately and one of them is my relationship life, or lack thereof would be a better way of putting it. I started talking to this guy back in NC and I was thinking "Wow this is so cool! I'm going to have a boyfriend this summer." But the more we talked, the more I realized that he isn't very spiritually mature. I started making excuses for him being that way but I started feeling guilty and I knew it was the Holy Spirit convicting me, I just didn't want to admit it. Then this morning at church the Pastor spoke about leaving all the extra baggage we have and I felt super convicted that this guy would just be extra baggage right now. It was hard, but I had to end up sending him a facebook message explaining that I feel like it wouldn't be right for us to be together. And that really took a weight off my chest.
Well, I really feel that God is telling me to spend more time with Him, and He'll bring in who He has for me in His timing, not mine. And if that ends up being in the next few days or in the next few years, I have decided to leave that to Him and give Him control.